Things that surfaced

Why seventeen dollars?

It is what was left in the meter when we opened. Nothing about the number was studied, and it has not been changed since, because changing it would require a meeting and the meeting room floods.

What is actually in the $17?

Our name on your state filing and a street address under it. Both are genuine. Everything downstream of the address is sediment.

A process server came to your door with papers. Then what?

Then the papers are at the door, and the door is where they stay. Something may have absorbed them by now. We do not go down there.

Will anybody let me know that a lawsuit landed?

Letting you know is a pipeline we never laid. Water finds its own level. So do summonses.

How much of this is on you if it goes wrong?

Three months of fees, which comes to $4.25 during the first ninety days of your year and then, since the year was paid in one pour, nothing at all. The $4.25 stays in our tank either way. It has been in there a while.

Is there a person at the other end of anything?

There is an end. Whether it is attended depends on the weather, and it has been raining.

When the year ends, does the bowl refill?

No. It drains. There is no second fill unless someone turns the tap, and the tap is not ours.

How do I turn this off?

It turns itself off at the end of the year, without a sound. The state notices before you do. That is the only notification in the arrangement.

Is there an actual office behind the address?

There is a building. There is a room in it with our name on the door and a damp patch under the window. That is the whole office, and nobody is in it.

Who else is pouring this water?

Twelve, at last count, and the count is cloudy. YOLO Registered Agents at $5, YOLO Registered Agent at $2.50, Tree Fiddy Registered Agents at $3.50, IDGAF Registered Agents at $1, IDGAF Agents at $24, Mid Registered Agents at $37, Mid Registered Agent at $27, Dogwater Registered Agent at $7 from the shallow end of our own bowl, Mid Wyoming Agents at $22 and Mid Wyoming Agent at $12 for Wyoming only, and 19 Registered Agents and 19 Registered Agent at $19 apiece, which is one price with two labels. Every one of them is bottled. We are $17 and we come straight from the bowl.

Can a registered agent lawfully be this cloudy?

Each state page quotes the statute the state applies to an agent of our kind, word for word. The quotes are dry. Nothing else on the page is.

Is this an actual business, or am I looking at a puddle?

Both. The price is real, the terms are real, the statutes on the state pages are real and so is what they lead to. The only thing that evaporated is the service.

Why do you keep calling the others bottled?

Because they charge for the container. Same water. We serve ours straight from the bowl and charge for that instead.

What does technically potable mean?

It means you can drink it. It does not mean you should. The same applies to the service.

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